My Declaration of Independence
By [Insert Your Name Here] , July 4th, 2017
The unanimous declaration of [Insert Your Name Here].
When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for a person to dissolve the economic bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the free market economy, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Commerce and our God entitle me, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that I should declare the causes that impel me to this separation.
I hold these truths to be self-evident, that all people are created equal, that I am endowed by my Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness.
That to help secure these rights, Businesses are instituted among us, deriving their just profits from the hard work of all the business’s owners and employees.
That whenever any Form of Employment becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the Individual to quit or to abandon it, and to institute a new Business, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its markets in such form, as to me shall seem most likely to effect my Economic Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that employment long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shown, that we are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right ourselves by abolishing the paychecks to which we are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is our right, it is our duty, to throw off such Employment, and to provide new Streams of Income for our future security.
Such has been the patient sufferance of this Individual; and such is now the necessity which constrains me to alter my former System of Employment. The history of the present employer, [fill in former employer’s name here] is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over me. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.
[List here all the abuses of your soon-to-be former employer]
In every stage of these Oppressions I have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: My repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Boss, whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be a ruler of a free person. Nor have I been wanting in attentions to my fellow employees. I have warned them from time to time of attempts by our boss to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. I have reminded them of the circumstances of our being hired and employment here. I have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and I have conjured them by the ties of our common employment to disavow these usurpations, which, would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. I must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of the Company, Competitors in Business, in Social Settings Friends-
I, therefore, [Your name here], appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of my intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of myself , solemnly publish and declare, That I am, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent; that I am Absolved from all Allegiance to the Company, and that all employment connection between myself and the Company, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as a Free and Independent Person, I have full Power to conduct Business, earn Profits, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent Business People may of right do—And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, I pledge my Life, my Fortune and my sacred Honor.